Thursday, May 26, 2011

Need Leaders? Roll the Dice and Let God Pick 'Em! (new blog post)

This morning I was reading in 1 Chronicles 24 and 25. (How's that for a devo throw down?  I read Chronicles, what do you read?  John?  Pssshhh!)  Anyway, David is appointing the pastors for the Temple, and this weird little detail creeps in.  When they are choosing who will do what, they don't use a personality test, check for who has the degree from the best seminary, or even ask who has the most experience.  They cast lots for all of it.  You know about casting lots, it's the Biblical roll of the dice.  They put the whole thing back in God's lap in a way that risks it all.  Either God controls the roll of the lots, or the Temple will be a mess. 

I'm not advocating tossing dice as leadership development.  But, what is our equivalent?  When we need to provide leadership to one of our ministries, how much do we take on ourselves, and simply ask God to bless it after we make the decision?  How could we change our methods so that we HAVE to depend on God to show up, or we will be dead?  No, seriously, what would that look like?  How would we "cast lots" to find out who to place where in our ministries?

I'm not sure I have answers, but I am going to think on it.  I'd love to hear what all of you think might work.

Monday, May 23, 2011

Completely Frustrated

As our ministry year winds down I continue to process and respond to the emotions I feel each year. We've looked at the feeling JOY that comes at the end of each ministry year, the need to stop and REST as the year end and the SORROW that comes as students move on. Here's the final emotion I feel as the year winds down; and if I'm honest, it's the one that I most struggle with ...

FRUSTRATION
Inevitably, as we wind down the year I am faced with some large frustrations
There is always the frustration of things I wish I would have done; or of those things that I wish I would have done better
Yet, that's not the frustration I'm talking about
I'm talking about that frustration you feel when you pour yourself into a student ...
... and they walk away
... they choose to live in sin
... they abandon what God has for them for a momentary & passing pleasure
... who knows better and yet does it anyway
... who just disappears from the ministry

I think of them
Of who they were created to be
Of who they can be right now
Of who they are choosing to be
And I get frustrated
I get mad
I wonder if it's worth it

Am I the only one?

So, what do I do with that? How do I process it?
  1. I acknowledge my frustration and anger before God.
  2. I spend time praying; I need constant reminder that I don't see the big picture and that I am not in control.
  3. I ask God to give me the heart of His Son from Mark 3:1-12. With those who should get it and yet don't He was frustrated with them and even angry with them. Yet, married with that, His heart was absolutely broken for them
  4. I go back to the first emotion in this process; the one of joy. Too often in my frustration at who is not there and who doesn't get it, I miss those students who are there and who are growing
____________

What else is there?
What are some emotions you have as your year ends?

Looking Down the Long Road (new blog post)


                Standing in the kitchen, I was looking out the back door as a horde of three, four, and five year olds were playing in the middle of a suburban neighborhood.  Dump trucks had been turned into carriages, the boys were climbing a small tree, and the youngest kids were simply running around and laughing at everyone else.  In the house, adults were laughing, talking, eating, and generally acting like 30ish year old friends do at a dinner party.  The unique part was that I had never been in this particular house before, we were four hours from home, and many of the people in the room hadn’t seen each other for ten, eleven, even 12 years. 
                Of the people hanging out at the house, over half of them had one thing in common.  They had all grown up in my youth group at my previous church.  Some of the couples had even met during their time in the youth group.  Over the previous couple of months, several of them had run into each other on Facebook, after one of the girls, or lady now, had posted old pictures from camp and tagged everyone in them.  One thing lead to another, someone suggested a reunion, another agreed to host it, and a few weeks later, here we were, all standing around, laughing, catching up, eating, and talking about everyone’s kids.
                It’s kind of surreal to see your students as adults in their early 30’s, with kids of their own.  It’s one of the advantages to staying in youth ministry for the long haul.  My wife and I are currently at 20 years in ministry.  This dinner party was definitely a gift from God for us.
                The kids in that room, at least they are still kids to me, represented so much of our love, worries, fears, hopes, prayers, time, efforts, and wondering.  There were stories about camps, road trips, lessons learned, rough situations we had worked through together, and what God had done since they left and started lives of their own.  It was, honestly, pretty amazing.  Students who we knew would do well, had.  They were sharing how they were serving God, loving their families, and a few had even come back to the same church and were now leading ministries there.  Other students who we were a bit more worried about in high school had grown up to claim their faith for their own, and were serving in ministries in churches all over the place.  Of course, some of the students who came were now adults, still dealing with some of the same issues they faced a decade earlier.  But they were still in progress, and God was still calling them to trust Him.
                The whole party was a reminder of who God is, how loving and faithful He is, and that the whole idea our ministries are really His ministries.  I know, I know, that is not a new or original idea.  But when God lovingly reminds us that the work is His, as are our students, it is so encouraging and freeing.  If you are in youth ministry very long, you will face challenges with students, families, and heartbreaks.  You will have students you are convinced God is working in, students you are sure you are failing in having an impact on, and students that you simply cannot tell where they are.  You will have great days where you can feel the kingdom breaking through, and days where you’ll feel yourself breaking down.  But if I know anything from my time in that kitchen, it’s that Jesus wants you to know how proud He is of you; that when He tells you not to worry, He really means it; and every aspect of your ministry is in His strong hands. 
                Standing in that kitchen, I watched my student’s kids playing in the backyard, and got very excited.  What will God do in their lives?  I can’t wait to see.

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Embrace the Sorrow

As our ministry year winds down I continue to process and respond to the emotions I feel each year. We've looked at the feeling JOY that comes at the end of each ministry year and the need to stop and REST as the year ends. Here's another one ...

SORROW
The end of every year is sad
It hurts
I mourn it
In fact, if I didn't, then I would be worried
It means for the time that God has given me with a student
Whether that be 7 years
Or just 6 months
I have given them all that I have
I've trained them
I've shepherded them
I've coached them
I've strategically placed them in groups
I've served them
I've loved them
And after pouring all of that into them ...
Now it's time for them to leave
That hurts
It always hurts
It should hurt

But rather than hide from that hurt
Or trying to hide that hurt for others
I've learned to lean into it
To embrace it
To show it to others
To wear it as a badge of hope for the future and memories of yesterday
I walk through that sorrow knowing that these students are way more important to God than they could ever be to me
And knowing that He has given me room in my heart to love, invest in and pour into the next group of students that He is bringing up

Maybe today, or this week, you need to stop hiding from the pain
And just embrace it

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Youth Five Year Plan

Goals:

  1. The ministry will be a resource hub for families.
    1. We will develop family gatherings for families to learn and grow together.
    2. The ministry will recruit and train families to serve as pastors to other families.
    3. The ministry will create resources and provide them for families.
  2. The ministry will exist 75% outside of the church walls.
    1. Family ministry at home will comprise at least 50% of what we do.
    2. Student's ministering on campus will comprise 25% of what we do.
  3. The ministry will be 85% volunteer lead.
    1. Volunteers will be well trained and serving in all areas of the ministry.
    2. Volunteers will be training new volunteers to take crucial roles.
    3. Volunteers will help in planning the next five years of ministry.

     
     

     
     

     
     

 
 

Goals

2011

2012

2013

2014

2015

  1. Resource Hub for

    Families

  

  

  

  

  

Develop Family

Gatherings

@ Church - VBS

@ Home - Advent

@ Church

@ Home

@ Home

@ Church

@ Church

@ Home

@ Home

@ Church

@ Church

@ Home

@ Home

@ Home

@ Church

@ Church

@ Home

@ Home

@ Home

@ Home

Family Pastors

  1. Develop Curriculum
  2. ID Families
  3. Train
  4. Connect as needed
  1. Families #2,3
  2. Ongoing Training
  1. Families #4,5
  2. Ongoing Training
  1. Families #6,7
  2. Ongoing Training
  1. Families #8, 9 , 10
  2. Ongoing Training

Create Resources

  1. Video Training (1)
  2. Web Site
  3. List of Books Available
  4. Blogs
  5. Newsletter (2)
  6. Calendar of Opps

    for Families

  1. Video Training (2)
  2. The Other 6
  3. List of Books Available
  4. Blogs
  5. Newsletter (3)
  6. Calendar of Opps for

    Families

  7. Video lessons
  1. Video Training (2)
  2. The Other 6
  3. List of Books Available
  4. Blogs
  5. Newsletter (4)
  6. Calendar of Opps for

    Families

  7. Video lessons
  1. Video Training (2)
  2. The Other 6
  3. List of Books Available
  4. Blogs
  5. Newsletter (5)
  6. Calendar of Opps for

    Families

  7. Video lessons
  8. Conference for Families
  1. Video Training (2)
  2. The Other 6
  3. List of Books Available
  4. Blogs
  5. Newsletter (6)
  6. Calendar of Opps for

    Families

  7. Video lessons
  8. Conference for Families
  9. Paid Speaker
  10. Weekly Podcast

The ministry will exist

75% outside of church walls.

  

  

  

  

  

  1. Family Ministry 50%

10%

20%

30%

40%

50%

  1. Students on campus 25%

5%

10%

15%

20%

25%

The ministry will be 85%

volunteer lead.

  

  

  

  

  

  1. Serving in all areas

50%

60%

70%

80%

100%

  1. Volunteers training volunteers

Define and begin

creation of a training team.

Recruit one volunteer to help

with training.

Recruit second volunteer to lead training.

Recruit third volunteer to lead training.

Volunteer training

team training 70%

  1. Volunteers will work

    on next five year plan

  

  

  

Create a team to begin five year plan.

Spend year creating

five year plan.

 
 

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Just Stop

As our ministry year winds down I continue to process and respond to the emotions I feel each year. Last time I talked about the feeling of JOY that comes at the end of each ministry year. Here's another one ...

Relief
As each year winds down there is a very real sense of relief in me
I'll be honest, I used to feel guilty for feeling this way
It would bother me and I would think that a good youth pastor wouldn't feel that way
I don't think that's the case, though
As our year comes to a close, our summer looks different
Our summer is designed to be a time of planning, a time of connection and a time of rest
During our school year we run ... and we run hard
There is no doubt that the pace catches up with me
And so we get to the end and there is relief
There is a chance to stop, to catch my breath and to rest
It's good
It's healthy
It's necessary

What are you doing this year to find some rest?
What are you doing over the next few weeks to find some relief?

Bamboo Driven Youth Ministry - The Next Big Thing (new blog post)


Bamboo trees are funny.  Not "ha ha" funny.  Strange, different sorts of plants funny.  You may already know this little tidbit of info, but I just discovered it.  Some types of giant bamboo trees have a unique growth pattern.  You plant the small seedling in the ground, and the first year, it doesn't do much.  You water it, care for it, make sure it's safe and has good soil.  Still, not much growth.
Year two rolls around, and all that hard work results in, well, nothing.  It's alive, but it just sits there.
Year three?  Bumpkis.  Nada.  Small, green little plant is sucking up nutrients and food, and your time, but not moving.
Surely in year four, it will take off.  Nope.
Year five?  Explosive growth!  Eighty to ninety feet in one year.  That little booger will take off and grow in visible ways everyday, until it reaches it's full height.
Now what if a bamboo farmer wasn't aware of this amazing pattern?  They'd give up, quit feeding and caring for the plants, and throw them out, or go find a new job.  It takes someone who has rasied bamboo to help them understand the patterns of growth so they can stay the course and see everything hit maturity.
Youth ministry is the same way.  Students will come, you'll pour into them, build into them, pray for them, feed them spiritually, feed them emotionally, feed them physically.  To what we see, nothing happens.  They sit there, green, and not growing. 
Eighth grade year?  Nothing.
Freshman?  Nothing.
Sophomore? Nada.
Junior Year?  Zilch
But then, sometimes in their senior year, sometimes in college, sometimes in their 20's, it will all take off.  Their faith becomes their own.  They begin serving locally and globally and God uses them in AMAZING ways.  The very kids you were CONVINCED would never become anything, they grow into beautiful, tall, strong trees.
Don't give up!  Don't stop.  I've been in this a few years.  I have former students in their 30's.  They will surprise you, I promise.  You do NOT know which ones God will use, I guarantee it.  His ways are not our ways, at all.  Be faithful to care for your little trees this week. 
Growth is coming. 
And it's amazing.

Monday, May 16, 2011

Killing the Man with 12 Fingers - Lessons in Leadership (new blog post)

Leadership is such a hot topic, and there are a million books, seminars, videos, and ideas out there devoted to how to be a better leader.  That alone should point to the fact there there is no simple way to become a great leader, and there is no blueprint that works for all people.

But I do think there are basic principles most people agree on, even though many of us don't intentionally work on them.  One of the biggest is "Lead by example".  Don't ask people to do what you won't do yourself.

David, as in King David of OT Fame, had a lot of issues, to be sure.  But overall, he was a good leader.  There are a few verses in 1 Chronicles 20 (yeah, people actually read Chronicles) that point this out.

"4 In the course of time, war broke out with the Philistines, at Gezer. At that time Sibbekai the Hushathite killed Sippai, one of the descendants of the Rephaites, and the Philistines were subjugated.
5 In another battle with the Philistines, Elhanan son of Jair killed Lahmi the brother of Goliath the Gittite, who had a spear with a shaft like a weaver’s rod. 6 In still another battle, which took place at Gath, there was a huge man with six fingers on each hand and six toes on each foot—twenty-four in all. He also was descended from Rapha.
7 When he taunted Israel, Jonathan son of Shimea, David’s brother, killed him.
8 These were descendants of Rapha in Gath, and they fell at the hands of David and his men."

Ok, so you're like "What in the world are you talking about?!"  I know, there are a lot of dudes with funky names from the lands of Termite in there.  But dig a little deeper.  This is a story about King David's men (Sibbekai, Elhanan, and Jonathan) fighting against the Philistines.  Remember the most famous Philistine?  Yep, Goliath.  Before Goliath took his permanent nap at David's feet, they OWNED the Israelites.  The Jews couldn't stop them for anything.  But young Dave dropped Goliath and changed all of that.  Now, here, his men are picking off giant Philistines in the regular course of battle.  I mean, one of the guys that died had 24 fingers and toes!  And He still went down in a heap.

It is such a marked turn of attitude and action for the Jews.  David leads the way, and over time, the whole army begins to believe that they CAN beat the Philistines, the force of evil in their life.


What is the Philistine army at your church?  No, not the elder board.  What is Satan using to stop your ministry, what stops your leaders in their tracks?  Are you willing to fight it out and work through that issue first?  Are your leaders weak in evangelism?  Then how are you modeling it?  Do your students ignore new guests?  Then what are you doing to welcome them personally when they show up, and how are you mentoring new leaders in that process?  Do you need teachers?  Then are you modeling that God has called multiple people to teach, or do you hold a little too tightly to that mic so that no one else can get near it?  David killed the first giant, and proved it could be done.  A lot more giants fell in the years that followed.  It set the whole nation free.


So, what are your giants?  Don't blame your students or your volunteer staff.  God has given you a sling and a few stones.  Go show how it's done, and then later begin teaching slingshot classes.  Lead.  Today.

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Stop and Celebrate

We are winding up our ministry year for our student ministries (crazy to think that we've finished our 5th school year here!)
Last week we had our last night of The ROCK & seniors night for 180
This week we'll have our end of the year parties for both ministries
Then we are done
Sure, we've got our summer schedule and our summer trips & camps
But this year is done

It's interesting, every year as we get to the end of a year I've always got a lot of different reactions and emotions that are going through me. I find it key to not only recognize what these emotions are, but also embrace them and respond to them.

As fellow youth pastors / youth leaders; what are you feeling at the end of the year? How do you respond to those emotions?

Joy
There is usually a deep sense of joy
I look back at the year and see all that Jesus has done
Leaders who have invested themselves
Students who have met with Jesus or were drawn closer
Victories and growth ... both the big and the small

So, what is my response to this joy?
STOP AND CELEBRATE

Maybe it's just me ... but I don't think it is
In ministry we have a tendency to always be looking ahead to the next thing, the next event, the next challenge
While that's not all bad, there is a tendency to forget to stop and celebrate right now
What does this look like for you?
I know for me I want to spend some time encouraging my leaders, being fully present with some students and giving thanks to God for all the work He did and allowed us to do this year.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Mentoring a Fatherless Generation

Amazing interview to encourage you to reach fatherless students. Remember the words of James, "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans (aka FATHERLESS or MOTHERLESS) and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world."

Most likely you have a student, if not many students, who are living without a healthy relationship with their Father. How can the church step in? How can we meet the needs of a student who is fatherless? What is your ministry going to do in the coming school year to mentor the growing fatherless generation?


Friday, May 6, 2011

Stop

What is it about youth ministry that lends itself to burnout?
There are lots of things that play into it:
Writing lessons
Planning events
Hanging out with students
Attending games / plays / concerts
Training leaders
Meeting with staff
Planning games
Leading parents
Answering criticism
Cleaning up
Explaining how come after cleaning up that stain is still there ...
and always will be
The list can keep going, right?

Yet, I think while those things play into it there are three main reasons for burnout (or just constant tiredness)
1. We love students and want to see them changed & live for Jesus
2. There is always more to be done in seeing that happen
3. We think that we can make it happen (or should make it happen)

And so we run from one thing to the next; always moving and never stopping
Our hearts our in the right spot;
But we soon find out that what Bill Hybels once said is true
'The work I was doing for God was killing the work of God in me.'

What do we need to do?
Stop
Be Still
Sit in the presence of God

We see this in Genesis 28:16.
Jacob is running like crazy when he finally collapses in exhaustion
And when he finally stops running, what happens?
God speaks to him
God reminds Jacob that HE is the one doing the work; HE is the one with the power; HE is God
Jacob wakes up and realizes ... Surely, God is in this place; and I didn't even realize it

When is the last time you have experienced the presence of God?
When is the last time you heard His voice?
When is the last time you were reminded that this is His ministry and that He will see it to the end?

Today
Stop
Be still
Experience Jesus

The Life Book Project

I have a great resource for you!  Check out the video -



Welcome to The Life Book Movement from The Life Book Movement on Vimeo.

You can find out about this amazing project at www.thelifebook.com.  The Gideons are financing a project for students to give out these books at their schools.  I had a conference call with them yesterday, and the deal is legit.  We are signed up for this fall.  I can not recommend enough for you to go look at it, and see if it will fit with what God is doing at your ministry.

Let me know what you think!

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Family Ministry: Fad, Phase, or Philosophy?

How do families and youth ministry partner? 

It seems to be the hot topic right now.  Is it a fad and a phase, like candle filled rooms and quiet 2 hour meditation times were, or is it a genuine shift in ministry direction for the church?

Yes.

And yes.

For some, it is the latest, greatest thing.  Some ministries are going to jump on the idea of involving parents so that they can grow their ministries, reach more kids, and see their youth groups "succeed".  They will ramp up the amount of communication they pour on parents, hold a creative parents meeting or two, watch a couple of family ministry vlogs, and move on.  When the next craze of "ultimate frisbee ministry with senior citizens" hits, then the ministries will grab that and conveniently forget their next parent's meeting.

But I think that is the minority.

I think most of the youth leaders and pastors looking into the issue are going to incorporate a philosophical shift into what they do.  That is where we are.  As a church leadership team, we are asking questions, and discussing answers that make me uncomfortable.  We're looking at how to get parents to own the discipleship of their kids, and how we can help them succeed like crazy at it.

We're reading and looking at alot of information from the Orange ministry team.  (www.whatisorange.com)  They have some good ideas.  We'll have to customize it to fit our context, but I'm pretty excited about what we are seeing and hearing from God.

I'd be interested in knowing where all of you are on these issues?  Any thoughts or ideas?  Is it a phase, or a transition?  What do you think?