Monday, March 14, 2011

You Know that One Student You Don't Know How to Help?

I have a student in the ministry who breaks my heart.  They are headed for a ton of hurt and pain in life if Jesus doesn't really turn things around for them.  I've had a volunteer leader try to counsel them, we've involved them in the full life of the group, and we've spent time trying to help the family.  It hasn't seemed to really get us anywhere.

This student has struggled at school, on her teams at school, and at home.  I've been frustrated at my lack of being able to help them.  I've spent time trying to speak truth to, listen to, and pray with the parents.  But in the end, I'm frustrated.

But I haven't really prayed.  Until this weekend.

I began praying some for this student specifically.  I mean, I've prayed the "God please help her to do better", "God, please help this work out", "God, please help mom and dad deal with this" prayers.  And like I said, I've prayed with the parents a couple of times in person and on the phone.  I meant every word I prayed.

But I hadn't stopped and really just begged God to change the course we are on.  I haven't really laid it out before Him and asked for some specific wisdom, and I haven't prayed a prayer of desperation.  Why?  Because I know from hanging around Jesus for a long time now, that if I pray those prayers, He is going to answer.  That answer is going to involve me getting involved at a deeper level with this student.  That's not something I've been jumping up and down about.  This student can be really difficult.  This student can be really obnoxious.  This student can really push all of my buttons, really fast, without even trying.

I was quietly hoping something, or someone else would fix it all.  It hasn't.

So, this weekend, in desperation, I began to really pray.  I began to call out, to beg God for help.  My concern for this kid began to override my own stuff.  I spent time with our leadership team praying for this whole situation.  I've continue to do so.

Later this weekend, I had an unexpected window of opportunity to talk with this student, and God pushed me through it.  I had to be persistent, and really work at getting them to talk.  When I finally admitted that I didn't know how to help them, but I wanted to, it all began to crack a little.  Slowly, God lead us through a conversation that, while I would not call it a breakthrough, or earth shattering, it was a start.

It's prayer.  Pure and simple.  Prayer changed me.  Changed my heart.  Admitting to God I that I was, and continue to be, in over my head with this student is what began the movement.  It doesn't matter how many times I've worked with tough students, I simply do not have enough to fix these things.  Experience, wisdom, and knowledge doesn't change people's hearts, Jesus does.

As a leader, run to Him.  Pray like crazy, and be ready for the change to come.

In you.

1 comment:

  1. Rev. Richard "Shrimpy" RamseyMarch 14, 2011 at 8:09 AM

    I had almost this exact situation on my mind this week. The student I was struggling with, was crying out for help in her own way, but refused to get too close or go into details about her life and I just didn't know how to get through to her. Everything I said and did seemed to push her farther away, and yet I know that she knows that my heart was in the right place and she secretly wanted help, so she never pushed me too far away. I'm going to continue to pray that over time...we can get to a place where I can provide the help she wants and needs to point her in the right direction.

    ReplyDelete

Share
Bloggermint